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Speaking in Tongues

I love Tila Tequila’s videos.  It’s a special kind of crazy that she spews forth.  Her website is a strange combination of partial nudity and conspiracy theories and paranormal rants.  Of her latest offerings, we are given a “song” where Miss Tila performs the entire thing by speaking in tongues.

What Tila is doing here is called “glossolalia”, it’s speaking in a language that doesn’t exist on earth. It’s practiced by many Christians who believe that believe that they are speaking in a language that only God understands.

Now, I could say that the MRI didn’t see any activity in the parts of the brain that control language because they aren’t actually speaking a language. Just as I wouldn’t expect the parts of the brain that control typing to show any activity if I were to just bang on the keyboard with my fist.

Speaking in Tongues is a thing that’s in the bible, so if you are of the Judeo-Christian belief, then you should believe in it too. Except generally, when they talk about tongues in the Bible, they are referring to actual languages, not random babbling. In fact, from what I can see, the Bible mostly speaks against speaking in tongues, or languages that your audience wouldn’t understand. Here is a passage that people like to quote when asked why they practice glossolalia:

“For one who speaks in a tongue speaks not to men but to God; for no one understands him, but he utters mysteries in the Spirit.”
1 Corinthians 14:2

Makes it sound like all this baby talk is a good thing, right? Well, if you read the entire passage:

“1 Pursue love, and earnestly desire the spiritual gifts, especially that you may prophesy. 2 For one who speaks in a tongue speaks not to men but to God; for no one understands him, but he utters mysteries in the Spirit. 3 On the other hand, the one who prophesies speaks to people for their upbuilding and encouragement and consolation. 4 The one who speaks in a tongue builds up himself, but the one who prophesies builds up the church. 5 Now I want you all to speak in tongues, but even more to prophesy. The one who prophesies is greater than the one who speaks in tongues, unless someone interprets, so that the church may be built up.

6 Now, brothers, if I come to you speaking in tongues, how will I benefit you unless I bring you some revelation or knowledge or prophecy or teaching? 7 If even lifeless instruments, such as the flute or the harp, do not give distinct notes, how will anyone know what is played? 8 And if the bugle gives an indistinct sound, who will get ready for battle? 9 So with yourselves, if with your tongue you utter speech that is not intelligible, how will anyone know what is said? For you will be speaking into the air. 10 There are doubtless many languages in the world, and none is without meaning, 11 but if I do not know the meaning of the language, I will be a foreigner to the speaker and the speaker a foreigner to me. 12 So with yourselves, since you are eager for manifestations of the Spirit, strive to excel in building up the church.”
1 Corinthians 14:1-12

Essentially, if you are in church talking to god, but nobody understands what the hell is being said, it helps nobody. It goes on to say that someone speaking unintelligibly is like a bugle that a musical instrument that can’t play music. But there’s more, let’s read a little further, shall we:

“26 What then, brothers? When you come together, each one has a hymn, a lesson, a revelation, a tongue, or an interpretation. Let all things be done for building up. 27 If any speak in a tongue, let there be only two or at most three, and each in turn, and let someone interpret. 28 But if there is no one to interpret, let each of them keep silent in church and speak to himself and to God. 29 Let two or three prophets speak, and let the others weigh what is said. 30 If a revelation is made to another sitting there, let the first be silent. 31 For you can all prophesy one by one, so that all may learn and all be encouraged, 32 and the spirits of prophets are subject to prophets. 33 For God is not a God of confusion but of peace.”
1 Corinthians 14:26-35

This actually speaks against the act of a group of church goers all speaking in tongues together without someone to translate, which is what the people in the video seem to be happy doing. Of course, the next section is also about why women should be silent in church, and they seem to be ignoring that part also. It also makes me wonder if Catholics ever used interpreters during all those years when they only held mass in Latin.

Now, there is another type of speaking in tongues called “xenoglossy”. Xenoglossy consists of speaking a language that you have never spoken or known about before this point, or speaking in a way that everybody understands you. This is something, that should it actually happen, would be viewed as a miracle. Looking again at the Bible:

“1 When the day of Pentecost arrived, they were all together in one place. 2 And suddenly there came from heaven a sound like a mighty rushing wind, and it filled the entire house where they were sitting. 3 And divided tongues as of fire appeared to them and rested[a] on each one of them. 4 And they were all filled with the Holy Spirit and began to speak in other tongues as the Spirit gave them utterance.

5 Now there were dwelling in Jerusalem Jews, devout men from every nation under heaven. 6 And at this sound the multitude came together, and they were bewildered, because each one was hearing them speak in his own language. 7 And they were amazed and astonished, saying, “Are not all these who are speaking Galileans? 8 And how is it that we hear, each of us in his own native language? 9 Parthians and Medes and Elamites and residents of Mesopotamia, Judea and Cappadocia, Pontus and Asia, 10 Phrygia and Pamphylia, Egypt and the parts of Libya belonging to Cyrene, and visitors from Rome, 11 both Jews and proselytes, Cretans and Arabians—we hear them telling in our own tongues the mighty works of God.” 12 And all were amazed and perplexed, saying to one another, “What does this mean?” 13 But others mocking said, “They are filled with new wine.””
Acts 2:1-13

Here, when the Holy Spirit enters people, it acts like a babel fish and enables almost all present to understand what is being said, leaving only a few non believers to claim that everybody else is drunk. The Holy Spirit wasn’t there to make people sound like they were crazy, but to ensure that the message could be heard.

Lastly, since I fear this post may make people believe this is some kind of bible blog, I leave you with this video:

Where Tila Tequila takes you on some kind of out of body sex experience. It’s reminiscent of those old Isabella Valentine hypno mp3s that everybody went ape shit over a couple of years back, only Tila’s video is more musical, and has more awkward sex sounds just kinda, thrown in at random.